uakari20:
bottan:
fauxfires:
bottan:
fauxfires:
ok so i was chatting with uakari, bottan, mikkeneko & eijentu and the topic of kurofai double penetration came up (as it does)
and mikke said she could illustrate it with ms paint but she has no ms paint skills
so i said i’d recreate something i saw on a greek pot once (this is the worst idea in the history of ever for what it’s worth)
so i did (with some cursing, as uakari posted here, i stand by what i said)
here, therefore, is the finished project: kurofai double penetration art based off a greek urn.
i’m really really sorry.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYRA! :D
*runs for the hills*
OH
MY
GOD
RIEKE YOU ARE OFFICIALLY AMAZING EVEN THO I AM HONEST-TO-GOOD LOOKING AT THAT CARROT & DYING OF SHAME
OMG, DON’T BE ASHAMED I’M JUST SHAMELESSLY TROLLING YOU *HUGS YOU* I HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT DAY APART FROM THE CARROTS ON YOUR DASH :DDD
OMFG RIEKE IT’S EVEN BETTER THAN YOU MADE IT SOUND.
ALSO HAPPY BIRFDAY KYRA, YOU’RE STILL A BABY BUT MAYBE ONE DAY YOU CAN JOIN THE OLD LADIES CLUB TOO.
I NEED THIS ON MY DASH
THOSE BEDROOM EYES, OH MY GOOOOOOD!
fauxfires:
zelinxia:
jlarinda:
(other than gazillions of porn fics, that is)
A series of drabbles orsome episodic sort of fic with little scenes showing Kuro’s progress in romance. He’d start being just AWFUL at it, like some moment where he just Does Not Get It and ruins the mood and Fay’s like sigh~ and lets it go
And then he sort of starts to realize that hey Fay actually enjoys romance
But he sucks at it so bad
So he tries. And like gets him some gift and gets so embarrassed and awkward he just acts all gruff and pretends it’s totally not a romantic gift stfu this was just lying around!!1 And he wasn’t thinking of Fay or how he’d smile if he gave it to him or anything sappy like that, shut up
And Fay is so happy anyway he gets encouraged and keeps sort of trying and having some rare awkward tsundere shy romantic gestures
And at one point maybe he tries to ask son, because son and daughter are all fluffy and cute and shit like that so clearly he must have an idea, right. So he brings it up and tries to brush it off like there’s no way he’s asking for himself, he’s just curious. or wonders because it came up in the manga he reads and he wants to make sure son treats daughter just right! And son just smiles all fondly and doesn’t question him much and explains what he can
Maybe at one point Mokona realizes how he’s struggling and takes him out for a day to teach him all about romance!11 and they bicker because wtf you’re a meatbun what would you know? and she gets all huffy and offended, because EXCUSE YOU Mokona is super cute so of course she knows all about love! and in the end he does actually end up learning from her and sort of easing up and listening because Mokona is silly but she knows her shit okay
And it ends with this ridiculously sappy fluffy date setting where he takes Fay to some secluded romantic spot and idk maybe there’s candles or flowers and Kuro actually dressed up nicely and he’s blushing like a dumbass and so fucking nervous because damn it Fay will make fun of him or maybe he messed up something and god why did he listen to a meatbun what was he thinking
Obviously Fay just jumps his ass because he’s the cutest ever and he took him on an actual date and he tried so hard and he loves him so much
Can someone make this exist please
I NOMINATE REIKAH
but kurogane would be the worst boyfriend ever tho he has literally no idea how to romance
so given that his sum total knowledge of romance is “heavy blushing” and “taking 300000 years to stammer out an ‘I love you’” it’s hardly surprising that his idea of taking fai on a date involves taking him to kick a whole lot of enemy ass and then getting massively drunk at the end while fai is all like ‘you know, i think flowers are involved at some point, kuro-gruff’
‘what the hell is the point of that? Unless it was like that giant maneating flower from a couple worlds ago - what’s fun about tearing up some plants?’
fai: :|
tbh i have this whole headcanon for fai trying to seduce kurogane and kurogane being really worried he’ll be terrible at sex so whenever fai starts with the bedroom eyes and the leaning over and the seductive eating/drinking kurogane is always like I HAVE TO GO I NEED TO GINRYUU MY POLISH
oh god
THIS SO MUCH I LITERALLY CAN’T?
also headcanons about kuro-first time and his 30-second stamina! i mean, on the plus side fai seems pretty happy with what kuro’s doing when they finally do have sex? but not so much when his ninja is suddenly a snoring dead weight on his chest :x
